Voulez Vous
Yes, I am an ABBA fan and I am playing the Mama Mia soundtrack over and over again at the car and at the office. I might as well self practice with it blasting away in the background. Haha. I just might one night. :-p
Voulez vous is French for “to want to.”
When the weighing scale climbed to 125 pounds last week, I “voulez vous-ed” to loose the extra pounds. And where else have I always succeeded in doing that but in Bikram yoga. So I seize the opportunity through Sundar Bikram Yoga’s first timer package of 700 pesos for a 1 week unlimited.
S-W-E-E-T.
They’ve got a Monday to Friday 6:30 - 8 AM class and a Monday to Friday 8 - 9:30 PM class. Perfect for an office-going person like me who’s bundy-clocking 9-6 M-F. They also have Saturday - Sunday 9:30 - 11 AM and 3 -4:30 PM. All classes start ON TIME and end ON TIME (or somewhat 5 minutes off tops).
That’s 14 (count ’em) 14 classes I can get myself to which brings my per class fees down to fifty pesos!
Now that’s what I call UNLIMITED.
And what’s beautiful about the Bikram style is that whether you’ve been doing this for years or just today (first time), you can all attend the same class and experience the full benefits of the postures regardless of how flexible/inflexible and strong/weak your practice is.
No need for segregation between beginner, intermediate, advanced. Everybody together. Each student has full access to the same number of available classes, with the instructor giving you the attention your practice needs…how the instructor manages to do that, I don’t know. But if you think you’re getting an easy time in class because there are first timers/beginners who will get teacher’s attention, think again! I’ve been whipped every single time, and the demands are more from the more “seasoned” practitioners. Haha.
For instance, my first class was with Instructor Ginger Diaz — whom I only knew by name because of an email she wrote while she was at Bikram Teacher Training last December and the email was forwarded to a circle of us by Bikram Yoga Manila’s Tristan Choa. She made me do Trikonasana without the aid of the side mirrors — hence it was all by feel. She also made me bring down my upper body lower and kick up my leg higher on Standing Bow Pulling. This is the first time she ever saw me practice, note.
Then next in my first time with Instructor Sherie Dyer — whose birthday was that same Saturday that I attended class. She made me look at myself in the mirror…actually, I couldn’t see myself in the mirror. It was a packed class and I was squeezed somewhere in 2nd row with my mat barely 2 inches away from those in front, at my sides and behind me. So in the balancing series, I would look up at the ceiling or down at the floor to focus on something still. I know Sherie meant well (please click on My Yoga Teachers tab and scroll down to 2008 ) and wow is it tough to stare at the back of the neck of the person practicing in front of me who would move out of balance sometimes. But to voulez vous to take on the challenge of holding the pose despite a weak drishti gave me a sense of satisfaction.
Then in my next class is the encounter with my first ever yoga teacher Al Galang. I got so many corrections from my dependence on using the towel for the grips, to sipping water in between postures, to getting right back into my standing forehead to knee whenever I fell out of the pose. Whether he thinks I can take corrections well or he believes I’m never hopeless to get corrected, I don’t know. He always just lets me have it every single class, no matter what.
Each class is super worth the money paid, the effort to drive to get to class, the effort to deal with the parking. I live and work at Quezon City and this Bikram studio is located in Greenhills. So I estimate something like 300 pesos (gas, parking, yoga class, towel rental, water) per trip.
I’m not going to shell out that money and effort just to be lulled to sleep or to practice where I have to do so many adjusting to the “practice conditions” — such as wearing more clothing (which is a burden to wash) because windows are opened in a non-heated studio, or dealing with insects (real and otherwise) in the shala, or having very limited space to change or clean up/wash up.
That’s just how the cookie crumbles.
Last night was my 4th class and I’ve shed off 5 pounds. Whether it’s water retention sweated out of my system or fats, I don’t really care much. My clothes fit better again.
Plus it was nice to get back to my Bikram friends, and to my first ever yoga teacher Aljearreau Galang (Who has sincerely matured and welcomes and acts upon all feedback. Kudos Al!) See, we really all travel in circles. 
Now for my fear: will heat rash pop up again now that I’m “voulez vous-ing” my way to a full blast Bikram yoga practice?
So far, nothing’s emerging. Skin’s still a-glowing. Thanks to a skin care regimen that involves creams from my dermatologist, Virgin Coconut Oil from The Farm at San Benito and Olay Total Effects.
OR, is it because I’ve finally finished detoxifying that’s why the rashes and pimples are now gone? Hmm.
New Soul
Okay, so it took me a while to write something to accompany this youtube material. And up to this point, I still can’t turn on the writer. There’s something about the song that speaks to me.
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake
La, la, la, la (21x)
La, la, la, la (21x)
See I’m a young soul in this very strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout what is true and fake
But why all this hate? Try to communicate
Finding trust and love is not always easy to make
La, la, la, la (21x)
La, la, la, la (21x)
This is a happy end
Cause you don’t understand
Everything you have done
Why’s everything so wrong
This is a happy end
Come and give me your hand
I’ll take you far away
I’m a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake
New soul… (la, la, la, la,…)
In this very strange world…
Every possible mistake
Possible mistake
Every possible mistake
Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes…
Tourniquet
Chona’s first to post about our first yoga portraiture and while I’m still cleaning up the stills from our cameras, reviewing the digital tape and finding time to create the page for Jon and Trin’s first yoga practice portraiture, please click on this link – my way of saying “Page Still Under Construction.” 
Thank you Jon and Trin for allowing us to capture you while in your Ashtanga practice…and also for preparing a delightful vegan meal after. You two are so beautiful in your practice, there are times I just want to put down the camera and watch.
Thank you Chona for bringing all of us together…and for bringing the raw materials for the cookfest. You are not P.A. - Pang Asar. I wanted you in the frame but you walked out of the frame instead…ngyek, Ms. Communication talaga ako.
Thank you Neil for capturing the moments on video…and for trying out veggie food even if it goes against your very fiber. (Chona promises to bring you a burger next time. Chons, gawin mong veggie burger!).
Until I find the time to post the photos (just the production shots, reserving the main pics for whatever we put together in this laro-laro yoga photoshoot project.)…
Say My Name
Signs that you’ve been away from yoga class for too long:
1) You are called “front row”, “3rd row”, “my friend”, “girl with white shirt” instead of your usual first name.
2) You are asked to register before class even when you’ve already registered so that they catch your name — hehe.
3) You walk into a yoga party and you recognize barely 5 faces out of the crowd — when before you knew (almost) everyone.
The first one shows that the teachers have now changed and your old teacher-buddies have moved on. The second one shows that the staff have now changed and your old staff-buddies have also moved on. The third one shows that the student-buddies have also moved on.
Going back to your yoga practice is always a challenge. And it’s always just a matter of getting over the hump. I was telling my dear sis Cindy yesterday that when I can’t pull it from inside or outside, I would just lie down in Savasna.
Mercury Rising
Since the start of Mercury in Retrograde, I’ve experienced a kind of slowing down that is both a welcome relief and an annoying burden.
A welcome relief because my coping nature is to finish everything in TAZmanian devil fashion. “Para tapos na.” Waiting for people to get with the program is not my default tendency. And it’s taken me atleast 5 years to let people volt in to the things that I pre-occupy myself with.
An annoying burden because my coping nature is to finish everything in TAZmanian devil fashion. “Para tapos na.” Waiting for people to get with the program is not my default tendency. And it’s taken me atleast 5 years to let people volt in to the things that I preocuppy myself with.
What a balance sheet, same item is a debit and a credit.
Mercury in Retrograde is a good time to be still, meditate, contemplate, declutter, finish unfinished business.
I finished many unfinished business these past weeks. God has a way of being very efficient in hitting many birds with one stone. And my lesson in finishing unfinished projects is you don’t have to finish all of them. You can let go.
Counter intuitive.
I had to audit the things that I really want in my life. Some of these have already served their purpose during the time they were undertaken. At some point in the journey, they are now becoming liabilities.
For instance, I decided to take another masters degree in 2007 and during the start of the journey it was interesting. Sometime over the course, It’s a burden. My default nature would finish this even if it kills me. But I computed the payback and ROI and decided to cut loss in this endeavor. The program is taking too much of my time and person than I am willing to give. The degree also has fallen below expectations. And I have other priorities where I would like to give that time and effort to…
Also, my yoga practice has undergone this Mercury in Retrograde scrutiny. I miss the times when I can just yoga everyday and still come home to rest early. Since the start of 2008, I have had a consistently sparse practice. I would be lucky to get to 2 yoga classes a week…after about 1-2 weeks of attending zero clases. I feel the shift.
Yesterday, I got to attend Bikram Yoga Manila’s Christina Stathis as Makati 3pm class. It’s perfect weather for a hot yoga class — it was signal # 3 yesterday (but so sunny today!!!) and I really welcomed the heat. My last Bikram practice before that was Friday and there I hardly sweat. Do sweat glands close up when you stop Bikram for a while? Hmm. That’s my pattern. And I find that with one more class soon after my pores open up and I’m back in my regular sweaty practice. I also loose the discipline of not eating atleast 2 hours before class. I ate a heavy brunch at 11AM and a tall glass of pulp orange juice at 1:30PM when my class is at 3PM. I could not bend over or twist from the core so much. My shoulders are also tight. I could not hold my palms together in Eagle pose. And my endurance is off. I skipped a set of Triangle, Locust, and Rabbit. Plus instead of Toe Stand (although with me it’s Toe Sit since I still can’t lift my butt off my heel), I did a 2nd set of Tree pose.
Despite that, Christina approached me after class asking how many classes have I taken. The context is I’m not a familiar face in Bikram Yoga Manila anymore, teachers and staff have changed. I told her I used to be a regular last year and this year just try to come atleast 5 classes in a month. She wished me to be able to come back on a regular basis. It was encouraging because in a way it showed me that my practice is still good despite all the “sparseness.” My yoga teachers taught me well.
Last Wednesday, I was over at Ortigas cutting yoga class at Vinyasa Yoga Center to meet up with best friend Lelet. Blast from my yoga past, Teacher Aljearreau Galang of Sundar Bikram Yoga Greenhills caught me in the street as he walked to his radio show.
Going around in circles is fun.
The Trouble With Love Is
Finding this yesterday on my blog stats made my day.
Search engine words:
I’m inlove with my yoga teacher…
I will not finish the sentence since the “…” is immaterial to this post.
Whoever typed these words in Google (or whatever search engine) and landed on my blogsite, thank you…and I hope this post blesses you and others as well.
I have a page called “My Yoga Teachers” — it’s a personal reminder of why my unforgettable yoga teachers are. A few of these teachers are still single and unattached. So if it so happens that one of them is the object of this “searcher’s” affection, please do have the courage to be happy…have the courage to love.
Go for it! The worst thing that can happen is you get over it. The best thing that can happen is there’s two less lonely people in the world.
Namaste.
Warrior is a Child
For our Leadership in the Public Sector class at the Ateneo School of Government, we are asked to watch and reflect on the movie Hero (2002 starring Jet Li).
The words below came out of the screen to open the movie:
People give up their lives for many reasons.
For friendship, love and an ideal.
And people kill for the same reasons…
Before China was one great country, it was divided into seven warring states.
In the Kingdom of Qin was a ruthless ruler. He had a vision – To unite the land
to put an end, once and for all, to war.
It was an idea soaked in the blood of his enemies.
In any war there are heroes on both sides…
The synopsis of the movie is — There are 3 assasins: Long Sky, Broken Arrow and Flying Snow. All are brought to justice by Nameless, a lowly prefect in the land of Qin. The King of Qin for 10 years have not slept a restful sleep and have consistently worn a full armour because of the 3 assasins. His edict brings a bountiful reward to anyone who kills the 3 assasins, and the hero may advance to 10 steps away from the King.
Keep your friends close but your enemies closer.
What is worth noting in this film is the wisdom of the King…what it takes to rule and how lonely it is at the top.
What is more worth noting is how one assasin, Broken Arrow, saw and understood the King.
What is most worth noting is how the King understood what it takes to get obstacles out of the way of his ultimate purpose. It meant getting his enemy 10 paces away from him. It meant getting his enemy to be within deathly strike with himself as bait.
If you haven’t watched the film, I hope this influences you to.
In yoga, we have the Warrior pose and the Hero pose. And we also have the Child pose.
The next time you do each pose I hope you remember the times you had to fight, the times you had to be a hero, and the times when it was so liberating to be a child.
Namaste. God is good all the time.
At a more yogic moments (yoga+comic=yogic) note, I got my weekly email update from Bikram yogini friend-Teacher Trainee Lorrie Bendicion. She says they’ve been made to watch Indifilms (my pun for Bollywood) for the past days until the wee hours of the morning. She says once the song and dance numbers come up, she tries to sleep in her chair although its tough to do. Chair pose?
No Surprises
If you’ve had me as a student, whether yogic or otherwise, you will agree that I ask way too many questions. In the academe, the way to handle students with way too many questions is to throw back “What do you think is the answer?” but I doubt very much if that tactic would work in yoga asanas. Hahaha. 
My sister in law once pointed out to me that I have a way of asking questions — it prompts the person I’m speaking with to “break it down.” Often I get a reaction that makes me appear stupid — like how much simpler can an instruction or statement get… Ah, if you can’t break it down to the level of your student then you’re still missing something. And no amount of trying to cover it up by making the person asking the question appear dumb is going to make you look smarter.
Of course all is forgiven…heck, we’re human. We’re susceptible to mood swings, (what Chona and I term as “penduluming” -swinging to extremes to someday reach equilibrium/balance), irritability, and the sheer call of the ego. Quite understandable when the common context of the “smart aleck” is what we mostly refer to when encountering some student who has way too many questions.
Which brings me to the point of this post. We all have different learning styles. Some are more language-based than others while some are more intuitive.
I remember sharing one time to my Vinyasa Yoga Center friends that I struggled initially with the Vinyasa Flow class of Jevi Lobitana. Coming from a year of Bikram practice where every movement and lack of movement is covered by a specified dialogue, I found Jevi’s class to be challenging. It posed for me the opportunity to be less mental and more intuitive.
Let me clarify what I mean by less mental by going off-track a bit — promise, I can connect the dots back to the point in the previous paragraph.
My bestfriend Lelet and I were talking about her swimming lessons. Us girls are planning to dive in Palawan sometime this year and she feels she needs to learn how to swim before heading out shore. I told her you don’t need to be a swimmer to dive but nevertheless will support you in that. Then she asks a cute request: Can I teach her to swim. I’m like, heck, why not just go for a real instructor? In any case, I said yes so we’ll do that once a week. But the point of my going off-track is this: Lelet says that she “mentals” swimming — kick legs, swing arms, float, breathe, move forward… and she can’t get all the movements straight enough for her to actually swim. It’s been many swim lessons over the years and still no swimming technique down.
Hmm… that made me recall how I learned to swim. My dad started me off at age 7 or 8. He just kept holding my belly up while I kicked and paddled my arms then before I knew it I was swimming on my own.
Kids! No wonder we’re not smarter than a 5th grader.
But since my friend is “mental”, I’m going to have to figure out how to teach her to swim through a more language-based method…then gradually ease her off to be more intuitive. It’s hard to talk underwater. 
So going back to the challenge of going less mental with Jevi’s class (told ya I can link it back), I’ve learned how to learn the way Iyengar: The Yoga Master book defines as imprinting:
“Most learning is an act of cognition, that is, an act of understanding something initially through explanation followed by comprehension — an act of mind. Access to and proficiency in the activity are then developed through applying the principles described to achieve fluence and competence in the activity. The important thing to note in this sequence of learning is the starting point of explanation: a process of mind. Learning is undertaken through the process of understanding what the teacher has said. It therefore involves rationalizations and the vocabulary of language, and it can be limited by these same factors. Communication becomes possible by rendering the activity into something that can be recognized by the student. By the same process, it implies that if something is not explainable, it is not understandable. If something is not rational, it is not cognizable. This is far from true, however.
Imprinting is the act of placing a set of images in the storehouse of our impressions — to develop a background on which we draw each time we practice. It does not necessarily require comprehension in order to proceed, and oftentimes, it defies comprehension inititally until it is fully integrated. For his students, studying with Guruji has left an intense set of experiences that are initially indefinable but are gradually unraveled as they are reexamined through the student’s own practice. Working directly under Guruji has required that the student develop their own practice in order to locate themselves within the experience they have had.”
So this to me is a penduluming moment: from a dialogue-based Hatha yoga style to another style that required more intuiting. All part of the learning process.
I once commented on Chona’s blog about how amazing diversity is.
Double Bass
This bag lady loves freebies. Yep, I use the free bags that I get. Recently, I’ve been using my complimentary Vinyasa Yoga Center bag…well, complimentary in the sense that I have a 1 year unlimited subscription with them. ;-)
It has it’s usefulness. For one, I can see clearly what stuff is where. I don’t need to have plastic bags for the sweaty stuff … which is quite annoying to pack up when you’re scooting off early while the rest of the class is still in savasana…although that’s been a deterent for my leaving too soon. ;-) And, walking through malls (SM Megamall, Podium) or Ortigas buildings with security checks is much easier since you literally just flash them the transparent bag. Neat.
However, walking along the streets of Ortigas, a stranger walked pass me saying: “Wala ka nang tinago.” Translation: You didn’t hide anything/You showed everything.
I gave him a sharp look since the usual context of his words are used when expressing “Have you no shame, you left nothing to the imagination. Cover up.”
Excuse me but I believe I’m modestly dressed. A linguist will always take the time out to establish clear communications.
The stranger cockily said “Yung bag mo, kitang-kita lahat.” Translation: You can see everything inside your bag.
To which I gave my usual f*&^ off-couldn’t care less-poker face.
That’s the funny thing about how we see. Just because we see a transparent bag with a wallet in it does not mean that the wallet has enough money that a thief would find worth risking his/her person for. Reversely, just because you don’t see the belongings in an opaque (and probably beaten-up old) bag does not mean that there’s nothing valuable there.
The eyes. They’re nothing without the mind.
I saw another perspective while emptying my transparent bag after yoga class. I had a lot of feminine items in my transparent bag, none of which I attempted to cover up nor display openly. These are just things…creature comfort to a certain extent, maybe. No need to hide them. Hello! They exist alright.
We Filipinos have strange conservatism contexts. I find it funny how we socially expect our women to behave as if they are not women. I also find it funny how some forces have contorted women to behave androgenously.
Ridiculous. We are all outputs of femininity.
I will still continue using my transparent yoga bag to pester the weak of mind…but mainly because I like using free stuff and no force is going to make me behave in fear. If there’s a roll-your-eyes emoticon in this site I would use it here.
I’m Back
It’s a whirlwind month of May…typhoon Cosme let out a fury in our province of Pangasinan and I saw the aftermaths one weekend I drove for my dad.
My dad had his eye operation the beginning of the month and that meant I had to make myself available. Automatically, adjustments had to be made with the rest of the “things” that occupies space in my life. It meant less yoga practice time, less yoga blogging time, less office time, less school time, less gimmick time, less sleeping time, etc…etc…
Man hours is finite.
Funny how in the past I would just stretch myself to a point of spreading thin. Maybe it’s maturity or realism that brought me here because now I let go of other things instead of trying my darn best to wrap my arms around everything. Could be also that a hamstring injury leads one to realize how something overstretched can just snap broken…and how long it takes to recover.
The adjustment I think has done me well. Keeping other things out of my space has allowed me to concentrate more on those that are present in my current space.
It meant more “wala lang” time with my family. Just witnessing and experiencing idleness. Memorizing the lines and remembering when they were once not there.
It also meant more “effective time” with friends. Getting together has a definite purpose and not giving your pearls to the pigs, so to speak.
In our classes at Ateneo, we discuss about self awareness and self mastery. The first time I encountered these were during my Asian Institute of Management years. At age 24, I had absolutely no idea what those concepts translate to.
A decade later, family and friends have noticed that I’ve gone full circle.
Front loading all the investing reaped for me the blessing of being able to afford idling. And for the past 4 years, I’m back home…slowly reconnecting with my “connect the dots.”
One of my most favorite portrait pieces is the tree. I have 2 paintings framed and displayed by the front door of my home — painted when I was in grade school, stored for many years in oblivion, and then rediscovered only in 2005. As early as in my tweens I loved trees. And in my yoga practice I enjoy the tree pose.
Driving back to Manila from Pangasinan, I saw many trees. They weathered the storm.
The Lens Man
This post has absolutely nothing to do with my yoga practice…just yet.
My dear friend Neil Burdeos says he will take my yoga portraits. His talent in visual arts is not something to belittle. Take a look for yourself at www.directorscutdvp.com and I bet you will hold your breath — yoga pun intended.
I don’t know though how we’re going to manage pulling off a yoga shoot. This yogini has the uncanny ability to thwart any photographer’s attempt.
Hmm…
Perhaps this is my karma. He was my classmate at De La Salle University, AB Communication Arts. I remember enrollment/registration freshman year and I was in line…there was this very noisy guy behind me and when I looked back, saw the face that came with the voice and wanted to scream at him to shut up. Good thing I didn’t because come first day of class in the classroom, he was there. Ay.
Then, came majors time. We are partners in Introduction to Broadcasting (which ironically I might teach in the future) and he fumbled his part in our report. Having crammed for 4 nights straight on the project, I was at the end of my fuse. At the halls of our department, in front of my batchmates (and then some), I screamed at him. Tsk. Tsk.
We didn’t end it there though. I recommended him to my boss back in 1996, Cecile Ilagan, at ABS-CBN International The Filipino Channel (my first job out of college). I felt overloaded at work then and thought it would be good to have someone come in and take on some of the workload. Ha! He came in alright and I had to edit for him! (mind you, I edited my own pieces so editing for someone else is not my programming) — As early as then, he is the Director.
KN (Kuya Neil), as our circle fondly addresses him, stayed to get deep in the creatives. He really had that in him as early as in our teensomethings. Now in our thirtysomething, he’s still doing what he loves to do…creatively in the world of non-mainstream, making real life movies instead.
I will meditate on this…if I’ll let this lensman capture my yoga portraits. What I had in mind was to get yogis/yoginis to pose for me and I’m the lenswoman. Not me posing with someone else calling the shots.
Only When I Sleep
In one of my many chats with Teacher Pio Baquiran of Vinyasa Yoga Center, he shared one time that he came home from a busy day of teaching yoga and plopped down his sofa with his backpack still on his shoulder and closed his eyes to rest briefly. By the time he opened them, it was already morning. Occupational hazard.
In one of my rare chats with Ms. Universe/fellow yogini Miriam Quiambao (who enviably sleeps in our savasanas at Vinyasa Yoga Center while I fidget and worry about bestfriend ipis), she whipped a funny term to describe her ability to just doze off at will: “masa — masandal tulog.
Ever since then, I would plant the word in my head — Crissy, be masa. Masandal tulog. Haha.
Not that I have problems sleeping. I can sleep well IF I’m in my bed in my home…IF there is absolutely no noise…IF I am not so exhausted (weird, I can’t sleep if I’m really, really tired, especially if alcohol is involved)…IF no one wakes me up with a text message or a phone call…IF no one barges into my room and wakes me up in the middle of my sleep…IF no one is sharing my space.
I wake up easily, slightest presence of energy I am up. I sense too many things and it’s not the horror movie kind.
Through the years, I’ve been reflecting on this nature and if it’s something I embrace or would like to change. It’s a big question mark swimming in my head — good thing I’ve learned not minding taking a long time for closures.
When I started reading up on Feng Shui, it introduced me to energy concepts. How color scheme, prints and patterns affect us (so check you bed sheets and see if it’s yang energy) Or how electronic gadgets in the modern life affect us humans. One article I read mentions that a TV in the bedroom is not good because of the energy emitted — yang energy, when the bedroom should be yin so that one may rest peacefully. So I moved my TV to another side of my room, where the bed is not in it’s path. The same article also mentions that the bedroom should not have a home office/study or a library. Again, contradicting energies. Unfortunately, that I could not do much about. My books and home office is visually seen from where the bed is. The article suggested putting a screen divider but it is not practical in my space. For a while, I had no closure for this.
Until I came across another feng shui article saying that as long as the switches are off, cables unplugged, and computer monitors flipped down (laptop) and cloth covering are in place, then the energy is “de-activated.”
I started practicing that and so far I feel the energy change. I thought I was doing fine, until my Live Blood Analysis at The Farm showed that at a cellular level Crissy is exhausted and running on energy reserve. It’s the Filipino meaning for the term “lo batt.”
At first I found this hard to accept. I sleep 8 hours a night much to the annoyance of my hyperactive parents who want to be on the go on the days that I am not attending to work, school, yoga or whatever. How can I be lo batt? Also, could it be that my LBA is just reflective of not having slept that Friday night in anticipation of an early drive to Batangas the following crack of dawn. But then again, I slept Saturday and Sunday nights but still battery not fully charged.
That’s when the concept of deep restful fully-charging sleep was introduced to me. Ah, that I haven’t learned how to do.
I traced back my life and tried to figure out where I learned light sleeping or not sleeping. Ah, my broadcast years as producer. Every one is knocked out, Crissy is still awake running like the Energizer bunny. The longest I’ve gone without sleep was a week straight - which some doctor friends found hard to believe because even in their internships they’ve never encountered that.
My bestfriend Lelet “lectured” on how to do deep sleep. She says just visualize a closed bubble and release. Go sink in to your rest. I think it helps that I think really deep ocean and just sinking down to the ocean floor. I added to her lecture images of Pio and Miriam knocked out asleep just as easily as snapping your fingers. If they can do it, I can learn how to do it too.
Then Teacher Pio added to this with his lecture. Sleep by 9pm-10pm. Close all lights, draw all curtains, don’t have a heavy meal a couple of hours before bedtime.
I got it! Now I can savasana and mumble a complaint when it’s time to wake up – haha, grumpy. Now I can fully charge at night. Thanks to the help of my sleepy friends.
My other bestfriend Rica who is updated with my thought processes, asked me to teach her how to deep sleep. When she attended Teacher Pio’s class after our paint ball Saturday, she got to ask Teacher Pio himself. Goody. This weekend we are going out of town, let’s see if this travel best friends can put to practice what we’ve been taught.
In the meantime, I’m ahead by a few intelligence points. Yesterday, in my class outing with my Ateneo Masters in Public Management classmates (courtesy of SBMA director Jobo Magsaysay, maraming salamat!), I slept instead of swimming in the beach. Unfortunately, turning on the deep sleep button is a not so good idea at the beach. I am sun-burnt. Dang it.
Di pala okay masandal tulog sa beach…kasi masandal sunog.
PS:
At one time I text messaged Jane and Chona about my savasana self portrait concept. I wanted to lie down in corpse pose with the forensic crime scene chalk lining around my body. Jane opposed vehemently. Morbid! Chona said go! She thought I would use ipis chalk since my savasanas are pestered by bestfriend ipis.
Even Better Than The Real Thing — Dos
This is what I had for 3 out of 7 meals at The Farm San Benito.
It’s The Farm’s “Scrambled eggs” made of tofu. It’s mocked scrambled egg that tastes like the real one. I almost finished the serving at the breakfast buffet table. Then when my bestfriend Lelet took a Live Food preparation class, I requested her to ask the chef to teach her how to make this and then if I could be served what they make for my dinner later on that day. Again, I finished the whole batch that they made. Hehe. And then the next morning, I had this in the buffet breakfast again. Lelet says she has a funny feeling that coming back to Manila, I will be craving for this — it’s been 3 weeks now and I haven’t craved for it. But if I’m ever back in The Farm, I will definitely ask for this again.
I still have to get the exact recipe from Lelet but here’s what I recall: the tofu used is somekind of hard tofu that imitates the texture of boiled egg white (funny, what’s scrambled about boiled), then the yellow stuff is squash. Now that’s even better than the real thing.
The Breakfast Philosophy at The Farm is something to consider. Here’s what was written in their brochure:
Every time we sit down for a meal we are exercising choices that will influence our health. Good or poor health will be the result of these choices.
Here are some guidelines about how to choose a healthy, nourishing breakfast.
Since childhood, you know that “Breakfast” is the most important meal of the day, right? Wrong! And here is why…
After a hopefully early evening dinner, our body has all night o digest and metabilize the food taken in that entire previous day. Our elimination organs like kidneys and liver begin their work well after midnight, mostly even as late as between 2 a.m. and 3 a.m. Their important work of elimination of toxins and substances harmful toour bodies takes from 6 to 8 hours, depending on the quality of food ingested during the previous day. During this period (when lots of energy is needed to carry out these elimination/detoxification functions) it is unwise to burden our systems/organs by adding new loads of food that then too, needs to be dealt with. In other words, two processes are clashing:
1) the ongoing housecleaning
2) the ingestion of, in most cases, new garbage (breakfast of fried rice and fish, hashed potatoes, fried eggs with bacon, etc.)
Think twice therefore when hearing the alleged wise words:
“Eat breakfast like an emperor, lunch like a nobleman and dinner like a pauper.”
Fact is…you would, for the reason outlined, do your body a great favor would you skip breakfast altogether. If this choice is uncomfortable to you, especially when you might be reding this while sitting down at “the Farm’s” sumptuous breakfast buffet, let us assist you in making a decision what a healthy breakfast for you coud look like.
Please understand that “Standard American Diet” (or Filipino, or…) foods are highly processed, packed with artificial flavor, colors, preservatives and countless substances toxic to the human body. Breakfast cereals, tetra pack juices, shancks, white flour breads, refined sugar/salt etc. that we eat and feed our children with are addictive and incredibly unhealthy.
The Farm does not serve any kind of such foods. Our breakfast offers the whole foods: unprocessed, non-toxic, fresh and most importantly organic. Yet there are differences in each of the offered food groups contributing to your health…
1) Fruits and juices
2) Salads
3) Non-dairy Milks and Yogurt
4) Mueslis & Cereals
5) Breads
6) Cooked Foods
Point 1 - most nutritious, easiest to digest and eliminate, lightest foods.
Point 6 - least nutrituous, slow to digest and eliminate, dense foods.
Conclusion:
The healthiest foods for your body are those that are easiest to digest - foods that pass through your body, leaving the least amount of residue that can trun into waste matter that clog your system.
What an interesting experience.
Now how to translate it in Metro Manila everyday living… With friends and family who think I’m weirding out after they find out I’ve taken out red meat, soft drinks and all ”healthy” beverages (read the labels!!! it’s fake healthy) and get stressed over chicken (it’s loaded with growth hormones!!! to our bodies, it’s carcinogenic.)
Hay.
Even Better Than The Real Thing — Uno
I don’t know if my classmates (or my professor) at Ateneo School of Government are accessing this site looking for how I wrote our policy papers and leadership papers…the blog stats I’m seeing point to either it’s them or I’ve managed to enter some political blog community…
In any case, here is my first of three installments to cap off our Policy class. And this is a written/linguistic mind map of my thoughts on liquidity.
I celebrated my 33rd birthday at The Farm San Benito this year. I was there with my best friend Lelet Volfango and the picture above shows how different we are when it comes to water intake. I brought the 6-liter while she brought the 1-liter. Please note that this is in anticipation of a 3-day stay.
When I started my Bikram yoga practice in 2006, I was already drinking at least 8 glasses of water a day. I had a very small kidney stone when I was in college. I attribute it to years of not using public rest rooms for fear of its lack of sanitation…and they were unsanitary compared to home. So I would hold it until I got home, and back in grade school and high school home is just a walk away with lunch and recess spent at home away from the chaos of the San Agustin Makati cafeteria. But college was different. I think those were some of my most stressful years except my body didn’t care because it was young and my mind thought itself to be invincible. Until my kidney decided to speak up.
That was the most excrutiating pain I’ve ever felt my whole life. And it lasted for days. I could not hold my bladder because to hold it meant excrutiating pain of the stabbing kind. To relieve myself is temporary relief. I had to be a few steps away from the rest room, and I had to learn to deal with public rest rooms. Part of my treatment is to go all the way to the National Kidney Institute to meet with my Urologist, and to get my ultrasound in order to determine how the stone looks like. My doctor determined that we will flush out the stone, no need for operation. To pass the stone, I had to drink a liter of water in a sitting, as often in a day as I can. The stone has just left my right kidney, it is about to start traveling out. That very weekend, I stayed at home and kept drinking water. After a day, out came the stone. It was so small…how can something so small cause so much pain. I showed it to my doctor who wanted to inspect it and then decided to throw it away with the vow never again. Recalling the fellows who sat with me waiting for their ultrasound back then, they all kept their stones from previous operations as a souvenir. And they’re back with a recurrence. Go figure!
Ever since that time, I would always have a built-in warning if I am dehydrated. My lower back will start to speak up and I take a few minutes to heed its call, gulping down a liter in a sitting. But since starting yoga, it never reached the point that my kidney would have to communicate with me. That’s one of the beauty and benefits of yoga.
When I travel, the first thing that I bring with me (if I can) is water supply. If I can’t bring it with me, it’s the first thing I pick up in the supermarket after checking in.
In my trips to Asian countries first quarter of this year, I got exposed to the prices of bottled water. To compare with home,
|
Country |
Price (converted to Pesos) |
Size |
|
Macau |
38.50 |
500 mL |
|
Hong Kong |
50.00 |
500 mL |
|
Singapore |
34.44 |
1000 mL (buy 1 take 3) |
|
Philippines |
28.00 |
500 mL |
Singapore is where I found the cheapest bottled water. Even if they stop the promo, it is still the cheapest.
Anyway, going back to The Farm, where all this fluid thinking came to integrate.
The water supply in The Farm is alkaline water – the best water (I think) available. I’ve been drinking alkaline water for over a year now care of an installed filtration system at home. I really invested in one. So to find out that The Farm has the whole place wired with alkaline water held me in amazement. I have yet to chat with the General Manager how they did this.
Needless to say, my friend and I did not get to finish our water baon. We consumed all the water that we could at The Farm – and then some fresh juices like wheat grass to which we say “Nagdadamo na tayo ngayon. Haha. Cheers”
Going home though, we were thinking, now what? Back to Manila where sourcing alkaline water is a challenge (unless you invest in the home filtration system).
The friendly staff at The Farm says: Buko juice.
Ah, so on top of my 2 liters a day of alkaline water, I now added 3 fresh buko bought from the Manong who sells it near my place of work.
Now this is what pisses me off.
Mr. Manong, after selling me 3 bukos, turns around and crosses to the sari-sari store to buy a bottle of soft drinks.
He is an out-of-shape man with a hardened beer belly.
I can’t help but think of a biblic verse: My people suffer for lack of knowledge…
I read this in a column many years back: How the coconut farm workers in our provinces work all day harvesting coconut, and at the end of the day spend some of their money on soft drinks. The columnist pointed out would they still do that if they knew how much better for their body the coconut juice is. Hmm.
Branded items wield so much power.
Naughty Girl
I have been a naughty girl…
…according to my Live Blood Analysis which was taken at The Farm San Benito.
The following are images taken from http://healthenlightenment.com/live-blood-cell-analysis.shtml to help illustrate what my freakin’ LBA looks like:
This is what a normal red blood cell looks like. Round and well spaced with the aura potential “halo” ring around it glowing. Side comment: I googled aura potential since this is what I remember the LBA doctor to describe the halo around each cell but funny that nothing came out from my google search. Hmm. So, this is as far as I can refer to — aura.
The doctor noted that the thicker the halo is around the cell, the stronger the life force of that cell. Hmm.
This is one of the few things I saw in the monitor during my LBA. Funny because according to the website that I pulled this image from, this is –
Protein Linkage: This condition is the first sign of cell stickiness and may progress into rouleau if not corrected. Protein linkage is a sign that excessive protein is being consumed or the protein is not being digested completely. As the cells start sticking together it becomes harder for the heart to push the blood through the veins and arteries.
I remember the doctor performing the LBA referring to this image as over exposure to radiation.
[I mentioned to her prior to my LBA consultation (since you are to disclose your medical condition prior to the procedure) that I had undergone RadioActive Iodine Therapy for my hyperthyroidism some 15 years back.]
Then she further says that my cells are showing signs of over exposure to radiation should not be attributed to my RAIT since that was a very long time ago. By now my cells would have completely regenerated. So she proceeds to ask me if I’ve been in front of the microwave oven, work in front of a computer or something like that. My bestfriend Lelet (who was with me the time of our LBA) was quick to point out “She works in a broadcasting station. The transmitting tower is on top of their 17-storey building.” My thoughts were: that’s 50,000 watts of radiation. In-HELL.
BUT after reviewing these images and researching more and more about it (and having discussions with traditional doctors), I am more inclined to thinkt that it makes sense that there’s too much protein in my system. I’ve been stuffing myself with protein for the past three months for my pulled hamstring thinking that that helps it to heal faster. Hence it does make sense that there’s excessive protein in my system.
Going back to the doctor giving my LBA, she says that the white light glowing thing at the center of the cell means that my cells are tired - that I’m running on energy reserve. She says that I should sleep more. I said I am always sleeping and I am always sleepy. She says I should learn how to deep sleep. Well…yeah, I am a light sleeper. Ok, I concede that. I’ve also observed that I can’t stay up late and spring to life early the next morning. I dismissed this as part of ageing but she says that I am in effect “low batt” and my sleeping “charging” is not efficient/effective/maximized. Ok, getting quality sleep, that I will work on.
Doc also says that my blood circulation is poor. Well, that agree with. I can’t fold a leg and stay sitting on it as long as I was used to be able to before. I thought it’s just the airconditioning at the office (too cold). Ok, another thing I can concede to. BUT to say that I should hydrate some more I think is an inaccurate call. I already drink 4-5 liters of pH 7.8 - 9.0 alkaline water a day, and no coffee or tea. I’m guilty of a Coke light maybe 4-5 times a week but that’s it. My last blood test for office medicals told me that there’s too much water in my blood they can’t get an accurate reading so can I re-take the blood test after I’ve normalized my water intake to 8 normal glasses a day?!? My opinion here is to stop taking meat (which I have since last Monday when this LBA results came out but broke it today during my dad’s birthday lunch – Inhale, exhale ONE).
These two images are Rouleau and Erythrocyte Aggregation. I didn’t see any of these two in my LBA.
This I saw in my LBA. Poikilocytosis: This condition is caused by free radicals. This also lowers the blood’s oxygen carrying capacity and shortens the life of the cell. RBCs don’t have nuclei, so they will not mutate, but the fact that there is free radical damage signifies that there will also be damage to the nuclei of tissue cells which is the beginning of mutations that lead to cancer.
I take Vitamin E (d alpha tocopherol) 400iu, Vitamin C 1000 mg (time release), every other two days. Since this scare, I upped it to daily and included reduced glutathione since I really want to fight these freaking free radicals. I don’t think I’ve ever appreciated my HS Chemistry more than now while reading more about these things.
One of these things (Microcyte, Macrocyte, Anisocytosis) I think I have but I can’t recall which one since the doc magnified the image a few times during the consultation and I wasn’t able to keep track. This just says that I lack iron. Which I think is fair and not a cause for alarm since women normally loose blood every 28 days.
All the rest of these images from http://healthenlightenment.com/live-blood-cell-analysis.shtml, I didn’t find in my bloodstream except for something that is attributed to fighting allergies (which happens to me when exposed to too many plants/trees/pollens).
What I did see in action though are my white blood cells. We saw debris of broken down “bad guys” in my blood stream and a white blood cell near it steadily moving on to the next target. Lelet says I’m not surprised that your white blood cells are fighters. Hmm.
Driving back home to Manila after that LBA, I was feeling really down. Gosh, all this healthy living and yoga and I still spot free radicals. In the middle of all these thoughts, I get a text message from my Vinyasa Teacher Pio asking how I’m doing. I straight out said I’m not feeling well…blah..blah..radioactive woman…blah. The next morning I read his message saying I shouldn’t think about it and I’ll be okay. That started me thinking, does he know answers to questions swimming in my head. Turns out YES, he does. Amazing how the Universe just connects demand and supply.
Our phone conversation that day just opened my mind to a lot of things about health and the human body. And that night, his savasana dialogue zeroed in exactly to speaking to me and my situation. It was the most restful savasna I’ve had at VYC. And I brought it all the way home getting some of the deepest sleep of recent time. Thanks, Teacher Pio!
Another thing that I appreciated in our conversation is when he said that you can not just resign from your place of work, that is not practical. He says what I can do instead is to act on the things that would strengthen my immune system. So aside from the 4-5 liters of alkaline water a day, I take something like 3-4 fresh buko juice from the Manong who sells it along my route to the office — who ironically turns around after I’ve paid him and buys softdrinks from the sari-sari store across the street!!! I will post on this some other time and count on it it will have some policy-nationalistic dimension to it.
Going back, I had a prayerful moment with my self and talked to my body — okay, I’m not weirding out here but really, the body does talk if we silently listen. It said, “kaya namin, boss.”
I’m still thinking things very carefully. And a few options have sprung up…broadcast is not my only playground.
My dear friend Donna said last Friday during my part 2 birthday celebration (with my friends, it takes me a whole month to celebrate because I can’t get all of them in one main sha-bang), manliligaw ako tonight — meaning she wants me to consider joining a Telco. I said as long as you don’t have a transmitting tower on top of your building, let’s talk.
I see fellow workers at GMA 7 and think how long have they been working here, and I wonder if their LBA will show over exposure to radiation too. Lelet told me that Miriam had her LBA a few years back during the height of her career with GMA 7 and hers also showed over exposure to radiation. Hmm. I will still study this carefully with the traditional hospital doctors and then bring it to management attention. I am also going to our Engineering Department and chika the men. I need to understand this.
I also need to understand what goes on when one gets a chest x-ray. Does this show cellular over exposure to radiation? Because I had one late last year for our Medicard renewal at work.
Another thought swimming in my head is when Donna pointed out to me that I’m also paying my dues for some bad habits in my 20s (the smoking, working really loooong hours, bad diet, sedentary lifestyle, work stress). Going clean and doing yoga for less than two years can’t just clean up a decade or so of “garbage in.”
Hmm…to be continued.
PS: My cells all had strong white light halos around them (aura potential), inspite of the radiation. Life force according to Heroes?!? Haha…I’m kidding myself.
Rehab
I am in rehab for being an addict.
The Physical Therapy Rehabilitation Center at St. Luke’s Hospital Quezon City for being a yoga addict.
Last January 14, 2008, a loud snap came from my right hamstring as I was settling into Hanumanasana. As I’ve posted previously on What’s Your Sign, I didn’t sense any warning prior to the hamstring snapping. There was no pain while getting into the pose or even while settling into it. Even after the hamstring let out a loud snap, I was still holding the pose again because there was still no pain. But when I saw that there’s a muscle tugging from behind to the side of my right knee (with the right leg extended out front), I carefully but immediately got out of the pose because I feared that that part of the muscle connection might be next to snap.
This illustration below is from the Complete At Home Stretching Guide by Lucas Rockwood:
When I looked up how the hamstring looks like, that’s the time I began to understand what was happening to my leg. My doctor Dr. Rey Matias and my therapist Ivy both explained to me how complex the hamstring is. They also explained to me the difference between a pulled hamstring and a tear at the hamstring or the hamstring tendon. The hamstring tendon is what connects the hamstring muscles to the sitting bone. If this is torn 50% or more, then you have a big problem. How is this manifested? You can’t walk and you can’t climb stairs.
For my case, it is diagnosed as a pulled hamstring muscle. The muscles are torn somewhere less than 50%. Which explains why I can still yoga (somewhat), run and wear high heels. There are times though that after a yoga class, I would wake up the next morning with a slight pain on my leg. Apparently, as my doctor and therapist explains it, an injured muscle that’s recovering hates being stretched. This creates little tears and prolongs the recovery period.
I also came across a magazine article on Yoga Journal (March 2008 issue). The article is Pain-Free Practice, protect your knees, back and hamstrings. The advise given here is to keep the knee of the injured leg bent in forward bends. All this time I was adjusting my forward bends/standing folds and forward arch with both knees locked and just bend my upper body up to where my hamstring would not hurt. Wrong modificaton since I still experienced slight pain those times (3 months counting) and didn’t get to work on stretching my spine! When I did my self practice, I started applying what this article advised and yay, no pain. Plus now I get to work on my spine while in those postures.
I took this advise a step further and applied it even on my downward facing dogs. I call it the downward facing dog that got injured in a road accident — you know those poor doggies that got hit by a car and they limp around on three legs (or less). :-) So the rest of my limbs are outstretched while my right leg is bent at the knee.
Talking to